Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Love and marriage

I guess I'm at that age in life where people I know, and people I went to high school with, are going to start getting married and having babies. Excuse me while I freak out about that for a few minutes.

One girl I went to high school with married at 19 and already has a daughter, but that just made us all think she was crazy. But now, slowly, engagements are starting to pop up, and wedding dates are being set. A girl I've known since we were babies (our mothers were friends) just got married and moved cross country with her husband.

Things like this hit me like a train, and remind me we're all growing up and growing apart. Its weird, because I don't feel any more grown up than I did in high school. (See: Name of blog). Sometimes, engagement announcements make me feel a wee stab of jealousy, simply because I'm dating someone right now, while other people are committing to forever. (Don't remind me about divorce statistics, that's NOT THE POINT.)

But then I sit back for a minute and realize there's a reason I'm not seriously dating someone right now. Its one of two things: either I haven't found the right person yet, or I'm not ready to settle down with someone yet. Either way, its a good thing that I'm not engaged, because the idea of getting married reasonably soon!

This is probably a ramble-y blog entry, mostly because I'm still trying to wrap my head around the subject. On one hand, I'd love to be in a serious relationship and ready to marry someone, and on the other, that thought makes me want to head for the hills. Like I said on Twitter, its an odd mix of my desire to get married and have a family, and my desire to stay single and free for now.

Is this my bio clock ticking? Cause seriously, I am too young for this shit.


sparkliesunshine said...

I hear you. I have so many friends getting married, having babies or both. I'm going to a wedding next month actually with KC.

I keep kind of freaking...I mean I was sort of married before and then I sort of got I'm with KC and we're so happy, we're so content. Why do I feel so restless? Why do I keep waiting for the time when KC will pop the question. It's ridiculous. I don't want us to rush our relationship when we're fine with where we are at. I do feel like there is just this outside pressure of what we think is supposed to happen in our life and at what time frame. When things don't happen just that shakes us up.

I think it's important to just take a deep breath and remember everything will happen in it's own time. I need to remember that myself.

Marla said...

It's totally your biology clock. Mine goes crazy from time to time too.

One girl I was friends with since the second grade got married at 18 and now has TWO babies. It's insane.

That's totally not where I want to be right now. No way. Give me five (or ten) years.