Saturday, May 16, 2009

5 Things A Truck Owner Does Not Want To Hear

Now on a much more cheerful note than my frustration with school, I present to you a rant, by the Grown Up Teenager about the 5 things a truck owner does NOT want to hear:

1. “Can you help me move?” – Its self explanatory. Moving sucks. Moving someone else’s stuff sucks even more. Not only do you want to put wear and tear on my vehicle, you want me to take a weekend and haul your crap from point A to point B. If I like you enough and know you’re moving, I’ll volunteer to help. If I volunteer to bring my truck, that’s like offering to take my pants off. Be grateful.

2. “I’m buying a *insert big item here.* It definitely won’t fit in my *insert little car here* and delivery is sooo expensive...” You passive aggressive bugger, you. Don’t think we don’t know that you’re trying to ask to borrow my truck without asking. I see your game and you don’t play it well. The only thing that's worse than being asked to help move is being not-so-subtly hinted at.

3. “I just need to move some dirt/rocks/stones/sharp metal objects/etc.” This many only be specific to me, but I’ve also had other friends who own trucks complain about how someone else will treat their vehicle. I treat my truck quite well. It’s my baby, just like a BMW to a man in the mid life crisis. I clean it, I wash it, I love it. I don’t enjoy scratching, denting, or messing with it, even the bed. It makes me die a little inside. If you want a scratch and dent special, get your own truck!

4. “But oh my god, its so much fun to ride in the back.” Fun on the farm, yes. Illegal on the road, also yes. The one on the hook for the legality of my vehicle? Me. And the provincial police love to tool around the roads out here and bust people for messing around unsafely on the road. So don’t hassle me when I tell you that you can’t ride in the box. Its like a trunk. Would you ride in the trunk of your Civic? I didn’t think so.

5. “Do you know how much of a gas guzzler your truck is, how much emissions it gives off, how bad it is for the environment, green green green, etc.” I had to throw this one in. With going green as a big trend, people with bigger vehicles get greenies after them. I get notes on my windshield, particularly in the city. I’m down with green, but here’s how it plays out: I live on a farm. In the middle of nowhere. On a road that doesn’t get plowed until the middle of the day in the winter, and is freshly graveled every summer. The truck hauls wagons for the farm, the boat in the summer, and trailers filled with stuff. You find me a smaller vehicle, that still has seating capacity for 4 or more, that can haul that and handle rough conditions and weather and I’ll drive it.

Feel free to chime in. Even car, SUV or other vehicle owners are welcome. What peeves you off about how someone else treats your vehicle or uses you for it?


Marla said...

I loved this post, especially this part: "If I volunteer to bring my truck, that’s like offering to take my pants off."

Too funny. :D

Lost In Splendor said...

That is so annoying. I really dislike it when people assume things in general.

I really enjoyed this post, though luckily I don't have a comparison. My car is nothing like a truck so I can't help anyone. Haha.